Only when it is dark enough, you can see the stars.

I figured it was time for a happy post! It's nap time again and daddy has just signed up for five evening shifts this week leaving this momma to deal with witching hour and bed time alone! I feel like I am psyching myself up for an ultra marathon! Today our angel decided to sleep for 8 hours straight, take a long morning nap, then wake up and roll from tummy to back. I know, huh? Nico keeps saying "babies are like the stock market." One day is completely different from the next, it couldn't be more true. Today babyA and I have been in love, those long looks she gives me with a wide open mouthed smile and giggling, then closing her eyes looking away and glancing back at me, like are you still looking because I still love you. Yep, today, she has decided to be an angel. She is currently on nap number 3, and it took 2 minutes to lay her in her crib, then I sat down and took care of three things on my to do list and had a knock on the door, it was our neighbor wit...

My beautiful 10 week old daughter is sleeping, swaddled, in her stroller, after being rocked in arms and rocked in the stroller for 15 minutes. Its 11:30am, its her second nap, I'm finally eating my first meal of the day after being awake since 715, but if you count last night I was also awake at 245-330 and 515-630. Oh yea and last night it took three 2.5 hours to get her to go to sleep so I went to "bed" at 11:30. So back to the present moment, because I only have 30 minutes left to type this! I know this blog post has been written before by some other very tired momma, but maybe if I write it down then it will be as funny as it is in my head. This shit really happened to me, I couldn't make it up if I tried. Things were going "OK" for a while after my parents left Australia, I have to write OK in quotes because whats OK with a 5 week old baby is different to what is OK to a life without children. My beautiful daughter (and I do think she is ador...

I wrote a blog post a few days before my due date....well here is a pick up from where we left off... My due date came and went, quietly, I thought for sure she would be here any day now, in fact I went for my 40 week check up all confident and excited only to hear the doctor say "she still hasn't moved down into your pelvis." aka she wasn't ready yet, chalk it up to hormones or killing anticipation, I cried the. whole. day. I know, silly right? I just couldn't stop crying, I went for a walk, I had coffee, I talked about my feelings to my husband, but the tears kept coming. Eventually I treated myself to an amazing vegan lunch and the tears stopped. I went back to using my hypnobirthing and sat in a sunny spot in the park and meditated, she will come when she is ready and my body is ready and everything is fine....ooommmm.....ommmm.. The next week was a slow week, I kept myself busy by baking and cooking! I made a new desert everyday, thank god I didn...

Today I am 39weeks and 4 days pregnant. I thought I might be holding my little bub by now but it appears she is content in there, hopefully for only a few more days. I'm as big a house type of pregnant and I'm also covered in powdered sugar from the French Almond Croissant I am not so delicately eating while sipping my adorably brewed soy chai late. I'm sitting in a popular trendy cafe attached to our local library. The sun is shining, its cold outside at only 8 degrees (Celsius), but the cafe is bustling as its lunch time and the locals are all filtering in for a cuppa (something warm to drink) and some toasty baguettes. If I was still living in NY where I was born, this would most likely not be a luxury afforded to me. I can do this on a Monday afternoon as I have no where else to be and I'm still getting paid by my job to "rest up, enjoy the peace and get ready" before my baby is born. When I first starting telling people that I was pregnant many frie...

My friend Aleisha gave me this great idea last week, so here it goes. Things I'd like you to know about life, but really most of what you need to know we won't be able to teach you, you'll have to discover on your own. Its funny writing you a letter when I haven't met you yet. I can't wait to meet you. I don't feel old enough to have a child, I will be 33 in 2 weeks time and I still feel like a kid. One time my dad (your grandfather) said to me that at a certain point in life you stop aging, your body keeps getting older but your mind doesn't change. I thought that was so depressing, I was probably 18 at the time and couldn't help but think how sad it would be to feel 18 but to look 60. Well he was right, I keep getting older, but I don't feel that different than I did 10 years ago. Except for the additional responsibilities. Never let a number tell you anything about someone. Make your own judgments. Life can be boring sometimes, but only if y...

I had an epiphany last night. I am not sure what started it or where it came from, its one of those moments right before sleep. I lay in bed chatting to my husband about something when he asked me, ¨how old were you when you ran your first marathon?¨ I thought you knew this story I replied, I was 21. Then suddenly I found myself 30 minutes later recounting story after story of my good old running days. As I kept talking, I remembered more and more stories, getting caught in a blinding rain storm in the dark, in the country, in Geneseo and approaching some stranger´s house in the middle of nowhere rather than risk freezing to death. I told the story of when I almost lost my fingers after running 16 miles in a snow storm without proper snow gear or gloves. I started explaining where my desire and passion to run came from.  It came from a place inside me I didn't understand. It just always had to get out. I didn't have proper running gear back then. I had sneakers and sweatpants...

Meet, flirt, date,fall in love, move in together, move countries together, get engaged, get married, have a baby.  Is that how the story goes? I guess that's how this story is going. Of course I just summarized 5.5 years of ups and downs, joys and sorrows, and many many moments into a sentence. I think we're much more than that, but sometimes its good to break it down. Sometimes its better to look at it for what it is. That's what happened. When I lived in Chile for three years, it felt like a lifetime, now I can some up that time of my life in a sentence or two. "Why did you move to Australia? How did you meet your husband?" "Oh, I lived in Chile for 3 years, we met there, Nico had residency in Australia and we decided to come over together for a while. That was three years ago...." There goes 6 years of my life in an opening sentence. I know its more than that, but we condense days, weeks, years, decades of life into sentences to help other...