Flying
On December 1, 2010 I started training for the Santiago Marathon, I started thinking about training for the Santiago Marathon however about 2 months before that, I convinced two people in my office to run it with me, one lasted to November, the other till the end of December, and on I continued. I had many set backs along the four month schedule, a 2 week trip to Brazil, a double ear infection that lasted 10 days, my parents trip to Chile, but somehow April 3 reached closer and closer and I didn't back down. My dreams during the four months of winning the marathon, qualifying for boston, kicking ass... quickly disappeared however as time grew near and I didn't get in the mileage I wanted, and the longest run I managed 2 weeks before the marathon was a measely 17 miles, not quite close to the 26.2 I would need to run. Well I decided, no matter what I would go out that day and see what happened. I was hoping with the fact that I live a very active lifestyle, bike several miles a day to my many jobs and walk everywhere, somehow I would make it through the upcoming 26.2 miles. I convined a few friends and my boyfriend to get up early that morning to bring me special chia water and support smiles along the course and with butterflies covering my body, not just in my stomach, I made it to the start line. The music was blaring, there was 20,000 runners, I mean, what? There were so many people near the start line I got stuck in a mob trying to make it to the porta potties and had to fight my way to a spot where I could breath and catch my thoughts. An incredibly good friend fought his way through the crowd as well and by nothing short of a miracle appeared out of nowhere waving his arms and shouting my name. Having gotten a mere three hours of sleep, and rolling out of bed only to come make sure I was off to a good start, I couldn't do anything but thank my lucky blessings for people like Stephen and hope the race would go just as well. The gun went off.
I made it through the first 10k thinking the whole time how I don't like running, how my legs were tired, I was tired, I had to pee, and I didnt know why I thought I could run a marathon. I finally saw a porta potty ahead and dashed off to pee in record time to make it back on the course wondering how I would run another 32 kilometers. We ran the first 10k of the marathon with the runners that were doing the 1/2 marathon, for some reason I kept telling myself as soon as they leave, I will ok, its too many people, I cant focus. The thing I like the most about running, is being alone. I love to blast my music in my earphones, pertend I am some famous dancer or musician, completely tune out the world, and match the rythym of my feet to the beat on the music, I lose track of all time and motion when I get in this groove and the more I run, normally, the better I feel, and so I run faster. None of this was happening this morning.
I crossed the 10k mark at a recordly slow time, I was disapointed to say the least, what a joke I thought to myself, you are running much slower than normal but feel tired, it's fine, just get through this thing and be done with it. The 1/2 marathoners left, the race quieted down and I watched the 42kilometer runners gear to the right, something triggered inside of me.
Suddenly I felt part of an elite club, off to the right to run the full marathon, I had on the right shirt and the right number and I was invited in, they thought I could do it. I was very proud of every runner next to me, I wanted to pat them all on the back as I ran by and say thanks for coming, you are an awesome runner, I am so proud of you for trying. And instead of turning up my music and tuning out, I took out an earphone and kept the beat in one ear while listening to the pitter patter fall of feet around me with the other. Families came out to watch the race, tiny children to grandmothers were cheering at 9am with signs and cameras, so excited to see their loved one. I was exstatic. I remembered why I loved races. As much as I truly love to just run, I also love watching people love each other. Watching families and friends support someone doing something difficult made my heart leap, I started soaring...litterally, I wanted my feet to go faster, and so they did. I crossed the 1/2 marathon mark at 2 hours and 8 minutes, I thought ok, if I keep this pace I can finish in 4 hours and 16 minutes, slower than my dreams, but good enough. I decided to kick up the pace, the more I ran, I watched the numbers fall, each kilometer was marked and counting backwards, shot me forwards. I had more energy than I ever remembered in my life. I saw two friends waiting for me at kilometer 26, I was over 14 miles into the race and I started dancing in the street when I saw them, I felt alive, they joined me for part of the run and this shot me forward more. My friend Stephen said he would stay awhile, there were more crowds, more smiles, I kept running faster.
Without any planning or prompting, my life started rewinding in my head. I thought of the last year of my life in Chile, I thought of the months planning to get here, I thought of the kids I worked with in the hogar, the friends I have met and said goodbye to, the struggles of learning a new language, of living away from friends and family. I thought of how much I had changed as a person and how much life I have yet to live. I wanted to do better. I ran faster. I saw my boyfriend run towards me with my special Tarahumara water at kilometer 36, where I told him I would probably be dying. I wasn't. My legs were in pain, but I could do it, I knew at this point nothing was going to stop me, and whether it was the crowd, my friend Stephen running on my side, Nicolas biking on the other, running through MY city of Santiago, or thinking about my struggles that brought me to this sunny Sunday, I was propelled. I never hit the wall. I started to enter what could be considered extreme pain at kilometer 38, my hips felt like someone set them on fire and with every foot hitting the ground, they were screaming for relief, for it to end, but in my head I thought, you have been through so much worse Meghan, you can do anything. Suddenly something so terrifyingly scary before seemed so small compared to several challenges I have had to endure in the last three years of my life. I ran faster. I crossed the finish line at 4 hours and 6 minutes, which means I ran my second 1/2 marathon 10 minutes faster than my first half, thats almost one minute per mile faster, although I know for a fact I was flying by the time I finished.
I crossed the finish line, had a few minutes of feeling like I would pass out, I believe that's normal after suddenly stopping a motion you have been doing full force for four hours, and then, runners high came flooding in. I never ever felt better.
I wish I could make everyone run. I wish everyone knew what it felt like to fly. The moment you actually let yourself go, you truly start discovering who you really are.
I got home from the marathon, showered, laid down for an hour, starting eating food like I never had eaten before, assessed my toenail damage, out, then we headed to lollapalooza, where folks, I danced, and drank and stayed out till midnight enjoying life. Running isn't scary anymore, it's thrilling and amazing, and I feel honored to have a strong healthy body that I promise to treat as kindly as possibly for as long as possible.
Thank you to every runner out there and any family or friend that has ever cheered a runner on. You rock.
I made it through the first 10k thinking the whole time how I don't like running, how my legs were tired, I was tired, I had to pee, and I didnt know why I thought I could run a marathon. I finally saw a porta potty ahead and dashed off to pee in record time to make it back on the course wondering how I would run another 32 kilometers. We ran the first 10k of the marathon with the runners that were doing the 1/2 marathon, for some reason I kept telling myself as soon as they leave, I will ok, its too many people, I cant focus. The thing I like the most about running, is being alone. I love to blast my music in my earphones, pertend I am some famous dancer or musician, completely tune out the world, and match the rythym of my feet to the beat on the music, I lose track of all time and motion when I get in this groove and the more I run, normally, the better I feel, and so I run faster. None of this was happening this morning.
I crossed the 10k mark at a recordly slow time, I was disapointed to say the least, what a joke I thought to myself, you are running much slower than normal but feel tired, it's fine, just get through this thing and be done with it. The 1/2 marathoners left, the race quieted down and I watched the 42kilometer runners gear to the right, something triggered inside of me.
Suddenly I felt part of an elite club, off to the right to run the full marathon, I had on the right shirt and the right number and I was invited in, they thought I could do it. I was very proud of every runner next to me, I wanted to pat them all on the back as I ran by and say thanks for coming, you are an awesome runner, I am so proud of you for trying. And instead of turning up my music and tuning out, I took out an earphone and kept the beat in one ear while listening to the pitter patter fall of feet around me with the other. Families came out to watch the race, tiny children to grandmothers were cheering at 9am with signs and cameras, so excited to see their loved one. I was exstatic. I remembered why I loved races. As much as I truly love to just run, I also love watching people love each other. Watching families and friends support someone doing something difficult made my heart leap, I started soaring...litterally, I wanted my feet to go faster, and so they did. I crossed the 1/2 marathon mark at 2 hours and 8 minutes, I thought ok, if I keep this pace I can finish in 4 hours and 16 minutes, slower than my dreams, but good enough. I decided to kick up the pace, the more I ran, I watched the numbers fall, each kilometer was marked and counting backwards, shot me forwards. I had more energy than I ever remembered in my life. I saw two friends waiting for me at kilometer 26, I was over 14 miles into the race and I started dancing in the street when I saw them, I felt alive, they joined me for part of the run and this shot me forward more. My friend Stephen said he would stay awhile, there were more crowds, more smiles, I kept running faster.
Without any planning or prompting, my life started rewinding in my head. I thought of the last year of my life in Chile, I thought of the months planning to get here, I thought of the kids I worked with in the hogar, the friends I have met and said goodbye to, the struggles of learning a new language, of living away from friends and family. I thought of how much I had changed as a person and how much life I have yet to live. I wanted to do better. I ran faster. I saw my boyfriend run towards me with my special Tarahumara water at kilometer 36, where I told him I would probably be dying. I wasn't. My legs were in pain, but I could do it, I knew at this point nothing was going to stop me, and whether it was the crowd, my friend Stephen running on my side, Nicolas biking on the other, running through MY city of Santiago, or thinking about my struggles that brought me to this sunny Sunday, I was propelled. I never hit the wall. I started to enter what could be considered extreme pain at kilometer 38, my hips felt like someone set them on fire and with every foot hitting the ground, they were screaming for relief, for it to end, but in my head I thought, you have been through so much worse Meghan, you can do anything. Suddenly something so terrifyingly scary before seemed so small compared to several challenges I have had to endure in the last three years of my life. I ran faster. I crossed the finish line at 4 hours and 6 minutes, which means I ran my second 1/2 marathon 10 minutes faster than my first half, thats almost one minute per mile faster, although I know for a fact I was flying by the time I finished.
I crossed the finish line, had a few minutes of feeling like I would pass out, I believe that's normal after suddenly stopping a motion you have been doing full force for four hours, and then, runners high came flooding in. I never ever felt better.
I wish I could make everyone run. I wish everyone knew what it felt like to fly. The moment you actually let yourself go, you truly start discovering who you really are.
I got home from the marathon, showered, laid down for an hour, starting eating food like I never had eaten before, assessed my toenail damage, out, then we headed to lollapalooza, where folks, I danced, and drank and stayed out till midnight enjoying life. Running isn't scary anymore, it's thrilling and amazing, and I feel honored to have a strong healthy body that I promise to treat as kindly as possibly for as long as possible.
Thank you to every runner out there and any family or friend that has ever cheered a runner on. You rock.
you are a superstar meghan!
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