Babies and Little Old Ladies
I'm currently in bed, laptop on lap, drinking red wine (from Chile) and eating divine dark chocolate. My husband is at work, my baby has been soundly sleeping since 7pm. I feel like I'm cheating on someone, I feel like I'm 22 and just finished a shift of waitressing. Those days when I would lay in bed and drink wine, eat chocolate and watch Sex and the City, because I had just waited tables for 10 hours and... because I was 22, and didn't have a baby, or a husband, or any responsibilities.
This moment is one of those moments I would dream (and cry about) 5 months ago. Only 5 short months ago when my screaming newborn would be up all hours of the night and day, when I would long for 2 consecutive hours of sleep much less an entire evening to myself eating chocolate and blogging!! Ha! I thought those days were long gone. It's true what all those seasoned moms say, it DOES get better. Wow, those first three months though, I really thought I would never dig my way out. The sleep deprivation, the constant demand of breast feeding, or rocking or bouncing, the complete and utter devastation of the world that I had known before having a baby. I remember telling my husband in those days that they didn't need to torture people, they just needed to keep them awake, I would tell you anything in a crying pool of snot and tears on the floor after a few days of little sleep. ANYTHING. even if it wasn't true.
Now I'm loving "maternity leave." I wrote a post a while ago when I was 9 months pregnant about how great the maternity leave in Australia was compared to the USA. Now I feel doubly sad for all the moms I know in the states that only had three months at home with their new babies. Three months! That's such a joke, you miss all the good times, today I laid on the floor with Amelia for hours laughing and playing with her. I'm having so much fun. It's just amazing how much she is changing everyday. I can't get over it from one week to the next she is such a different baby. Its amazing that in 9 short months they grow into these full humans and in the first year of life, SO much happens!
Today, three, I am not joking, THREE little old ladies stopped to talk to me when I was out walking around with Amelia. I don't mean little old ladies in a derogatory way either, because they were definately little, the last one I saw at about 6:30pm on my way home from the grocery store, with chocolate in hand, was hunched over with a cane and only had one tooth left on the bottom. She stopped me from a few feet away smiling, "how old?" It still gets me by surprise because before Amelia anyone that stopped me on the street I assumed they wanted money and I would advert eyes, smile and keep walking. Now I realize people want to talk to or stare at your baby. She's like a mini celebrity. I had her in my Stokke carrier, which she absolutely loves now. At about 5:45 she was getting sleepy and I didn't feel like putting her to bed so early because I didn't want to be awake at 5am the next day so I stuck her in the carrier and went for a long walk. It worked, because she just adores being carried, she sees the world from a higher point of view, can touch things, be involved in what I'm doing and she's cuddled against me. (Bonus, great work out for me!)
"6 months" I replied, smiling. The lady just beamed at her.
"She's tired," I told her as I looked down and noticed Amelia rested her cheek on my chest and wasn't smiling back, "it's almost her bedtime."
"Get a blanket on her, it's cold out here," she told me, "she's just gorgeous." And walked away.
I smiled to myself and rubbed her arms, of course it was cold for the dead of summer in Melbourne, but we were only a block to home and I was sweating from carrying her for an hour. That was the third time today that someone over the age of 75 stopped us dead in our tracks for a chat. Earlier in the day in Spotlight, a woman stopped me again with Amelia in the carrier and had a long chat, she told me that girls were way better than boys. I told her I'd keep that in mind. It got me thinking as I walked back home with her about life and death. This woman who was the last person I have talked to today before coming in and getting my little one to bed, she was so happy to see the baby. So many people are. Babies represent life and vitality...and hope. It's amazing to watch them, now when Amelia stops and stares intently at a bird for 5 minutes, I stop too. I know how corny that sounds, and I'm not advocating that all people should have babies, because there are definately some people out there that should never have children, or those that are perfectly happy without them. I was happy without her too, but now I'm excited in the morning. She brings to my life this whole newness, showing her everything and watching her eyes when she looks at something. Watching her figure out to pick up a cracker and bring it to her mouth and hear her much on it fascinates me. I felt sad for a minute when I walked away from the little old lady thinking that she probably didn't have too much time left, she looked close to 100. I thought someday that will be me and I might stop some young looking person on the street to ask how old their baby is, because it will be the highlight of my night. To look into a baby's eyes and think how big the world is, it doesn't matter how quickly I unpack our new apartment or if I get the matching rug I want for the living room, what matters is stopping and looking at the birds with Amelia and enjoying today, because well, these moments are going so quickly.
This moment is one of those moments I would dream (and cry about) 5 months ago. Only 5 short months ago when my screaming newborn would be up all hours of the night and day, when I would long for 2 consecutive hours of sleep much less an entire evening to myself eating chocolate and blogging!! Ha! I thought those days were long gone. It's true what all those seasoned moms say, it DOES get better. Wow, those first three months though, I really thought I would never dig my way out. The sleep deprivation, the constant demand of breast feeding, or rocking or bouncing, the complete and utter devastation of the world that I had known before having a baby. I remember telling my husband in those days that they didn't need to torture people, they just needed to keep them awake, I would tell you anything in a crying pool of snot and tears on the floor after a few days of little sleep. ANYTHING. even if it wasn't true.
Now I'm loving "maternity leave." I wrote a post a while ago when I was 9 months pregnant about how great the maternity leave in Australia was compared to the USA. Now I feel doubly sad for all the moms I know in the states that only had three months at home with their new babies. Three months! That's such a joke, you miss all the good times, today I laid on the floor with Amelia for hours laughing and playing with her. I'm having so much fun. It's just amazing how much she is changing everyday. I can't get over it from one week to the next she is such a different baby. Its amazing that in 9 short months they grow into these full humans and in the first year of life, SO much happens!
Today, three, I am not joking, THREE little old ladies stopped to talk to me when I was out walking around with Amelia. I don't mean little old ladies in a derogatory way either, because they were definately little, the last one I saw at about 6:30pm on my way home from the grocery store, with chocolate in hand, was hunched over with a cane and only had one tooth left on the bottom. She stopped me from a few feet away smiling, "how old?" It still gets me by surprise because before Amelia anyone that stopped me on the street I assumed they wanted money and I would advert eyes, smile and keep walking. Now I realize people want to talk to or stare at your baby. She's like a mini celebrity. I had her in my Stokke carrier, which she absolutely loves now. At about 5:45 she was getting sleepy and I didn't feel like putting her to bed so early because I didn't want to be awake at 5am the next day so I stuck her in the carrier and went for a long walk. It worked, because she just adores being carried, she sees the world from a higher point of view, can touch things, be involved in what I'm doing and she's cuddled against me. (Bonus, great work out for me!)
"6 months" I replied, smiling. The lady just beamed at her.
"She's tired," I told her as I looked down and noticed Amelia rested her cheek on my chest and wasn't smiling back, "it's almost her bedtime."
"Get a blanket on her, it's cold out here," she told me, "she's just gorgeous." And walked away.
I smiled to myself and rubbed her arms, of course it was cold for the dead of summer in Melbourne, but we were only a block to home and I was sweating from carrying her for an hour. That was the third time today that someone over the age of 75 stopped us dead in our tracks for a chat. Earlier in the day in Spotlight, a woman stopped me again with Amelia in the carrier and had a long chat, she told me that girls were way better than boys. I told her I'd keep that in mind. It got me thinking as I walked back home with her about life and death. This woman who was the last person I have talked to today before coming in and getting my little one to bed, she was so happy to see the baby. So many people are. Babies represent life and vitality...and hope. It's amazing to watch them, now when Amelia stops and stares intently at a bird for 5 minutes, I stop too. I know how corny that sounds, and I'm not advocating that all people should have babies, because there are definately some people out there that should never have children, or those that are perfectly happy without them. I was happy without her too, but now I'm excited in the morning. She brings to my life this whole newness, showing her everything and watching her eyes when she looks at something. Watching her figure out to pick up a cracker and bring it to her mouth and hear her much on it fascinates me. I felt sad for a minute when I walked away from the little old lady thinking that she probably didn't have too much time left, she looked close to 100. I thought someday that will be me and I might stop some young looking person on the street to ask how old their baby is, because it will be the highlight of my night. To look into a baby's eyes and think how big the world is, it doesn't matter how quickly I unpack our new apartment or if I get the matching rug I want for the living room, what matters is stopping and looking at the birds with Amelia and enjoying today, because well, these moments are going so quickly.
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